I have this fear, too. I don't really fear my children hating me because I know that they will find some reason to do that, especially as they enter pre-teen and teen years. There will be fights and doors slamming and lots of tears. I fear more that I will start to become more and more like my adoptive mother as I continue parenting, and then along with my children blaming me for everything, I'll blame myself as well.
I really don't want children anyway though, so I don't see it becoming a huge issue.
I do want children but I'll be honest - I'm selfish. I'm 23 years old and there's still a lot I want to do with my life and I just don't know where or when a child would fit in. My boyfriend really wants to have kids with me after we're married and all of that but I don't want to give birth (it would probably kill me because of my health issues) and I'm worried about adoption for the same reasons as you. I have always told my mom that her and I were not meant to be in each other's lives. We're exact opposites. And everything you mentioned about the crying and the fighting is what I went through. Why put another child through that?
I have this fear, too. I don't really fear my children hating me because I know that they will find some reason to do that, especially as they enter pre-teen and teen years. There will be fights and doors slamming and lots of tears. I fear more that I will start to become more and more like my adoptive mother as I continue parenting, and then along with my children blaming me for everything, I'll blame myself as well.
ReplyDeleteI really don't want children anyway though, so I don't see it becoming a huge issue.
I do want children but I'll be honest - I'm selfish. I'm 23 years old and there's still a lot I want to do with my life and I just don't know where or when a child would fit in. My boyfriend really wants to have kids with me after we're married and all of that but I don't want to give birth (it would probably kill me because of my health issues) and I'm worried about adoption for the same reasons as you. I have always told my mom that her and I were not meant to be in each other's lives. We're exact opposites. And everything you mentioned about the crying and the fighting is what I went through. Why put another child through that?
ReplyDelete