Tired of feeling alone

I haven't been sleeping much the past week or so. I wake up in the middle of the night in cold sweats or in tears. If I'm not having a nightmare about something, I just wake up in a rush. I feel as though I've slept for a thousand years - I don't feel well rested, if anything I feel like the exact opposite. I feel exhausted...like I'm so tired that I just can't sleep.

I'm stressed out, mostly because I don't know what to do about our lives at home anymore. All he cares about is himself. We're growing apart and I seem to be the only one who complains about it and I get absolutely nowhere.

It's mentally exhausting trying to tell someone over and over again that you feel neglected, that you feel a coldness coming from them, that you feel helpless, that you feel sad about where things are, that you feel like you are fighting a losing battle all by yourself.

I think this is why I don't sleep well anymore.

And then let's add in getting yelled at for no reason at all. I didn't like getting yelled at by my parents and pretty much stopped standing for it at a young age. Many people found this to be a problem - I did not. I felt that if it was necessary for me to respect my elders, I was to receive the same amount of respect. I refused to get yelled at and not be allowed to express my feelings. So I am also not going to stand for it when someone a year older than me thinks they can take out their frustrations at other people, on me.

I don't know where to go from here. Maybe it's just one of those days. Maybe it's just one of those months...but it is impossible for him to grow and change. I feel that he may always be stuck in his ways so where does that leave me?